Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
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