i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
