I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
don't judge my taste in strippers
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
