belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
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