I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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