he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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