I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
