People in love make me want to vomit
we made out on top of his cat.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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