i barfeds in our rink
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
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Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
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i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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