What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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