Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
