So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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