if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
