I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
