dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
