God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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