Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize