I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
