Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
third nipple confirmed
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
