Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
