Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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