T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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