i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
PANTIES FOUND
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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