Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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