I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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