Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
