i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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