so let's talk penis.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize