Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
