I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
