So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
