Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
