So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
