But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
The power of my boobs compel you
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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