You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
