i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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