YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
