I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
