if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize
