Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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