Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Randomize
