I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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