I just threw up on my dentist
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize