Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
