i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
