Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
her vagine was all disorganized.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Randomize