so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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