What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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