i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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