am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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