This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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